Seven

I stood on my balcony tonight alone and watched the heavens, breathing in the fullness of universe and breathing out the empty that resides inside me and I watched as the meteor shower displayed it's glorious performance.   Seven.  I counted seven in the half hour I gave myself.   Breathing in the fullness,  breathing out my disappointment of regular life.   Breathing in more deeply as the meteors shot across my head hoping to consume stray stardust to fill me up with the very elements which I am made of.  The basics.   The basics that wear down and become lost as we turn our attention to frivolous concerns of our life.   Frivolous memories that, if not kept in their proper proportions will become too big for us to hold in our hearts without them breaking.   Breathe in the fullness,  breathe out the pain of everyday emotional life.   Breathe in the chaos of the universe.  Breathe out control.

As I breathe, I pray for sleep with out the physical pain that follows me everyday.   I pray for sleep without the mental merry go round of reproach.  I pray for permission to allow myself compassion for just being human.   I pray that I remember to say  "thank you for giving me one more day to get over myself and to get out of my way"  before sleep comes and the stardust has settled into my DNA.

I pray I dream of groundlessness.